You may have been wondering why I haven’t written much lately. It’s kind of hard to write a first-person Blog of opinion when the “I” key on your computer keyboard was hopelessly stuck. It was a veritable writer’s nightmare, and it happened through a very interesting set of circumstances, on my birthday no less. Quite the unexpected birthday gift that managed to keep on giving, and it did not make me a happy camper.
In the well over 20 plus years I have been using computers on a regular basis, at home or at work, I have NEVER once spilled ANYTHING on my keyboard. Ever. Not so much as a drop of water, a sliver of spittle, a scintilla of snot. Not a damned thing. So, I had just completed the last of two blog entries (to make up for much lost time) on my birthday. I was feeling pretty good, having done my best at trying to play catch up; so I reached for my Dr. Pepper and 4 (count ’em) FOUR drops fell directly on my keyboard. I could see them…they were right there. The instant horror that hit me at that moment was positively indescribable, but it certainly looked as if there would be no serious damage to the keyboard. I wiped up the offending beverage, cleaned the keys off with an alcohol swab, turned the keyboard over, shook it to ensure that nothing was inside the circuit board itself, and turned it and the computer off. This is all what you are supposed to do in the event of a spill (the equivalent of a nuclear attack on your PC or Mac). I wasn’t too happy about the situation, but all I could do was to wait a few hours and see what happened.
After having a lovely birthday dinner with my wife and daughters, we returned to the house, and I pressed a few random keys on the keyboard. No problems; so I fired up the Mac and made the Bluetooth connection between the keyboard and the computer. I went to a message board that I normally go to, and started to reply to a topic, when I typed a word with the letter “I”. What transpired was a word that came out with “iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii” as part of it, and unless you’re typing Welch or are a literary narcissist, this was not a good thing. I tried hitting the key to dislodge it, but it wasn’t having any of it. I tried more alcohol swabs, an eyeglass cleaning towelette, both of them to no avail. This was not a good situation at ALL. I mean, it wasn’t a major spill! It was only four drops of Dr Pepper! And of all the letters to get stuck…”I” is one of the most used in the English language, and seeing as my memoir is in the first-person and so is my Blog, this was disastrous.
I spent some time reviewing the various keyboards out there (quite frankly, I wasn’t happy with the native Mac keyboard; it always felt clumsy and uncomfortable to me), and got one that I am MOST happy with; it’s like typing on a cloud AND it’s black; got to have a black keyboard…it is a MUST, especially if you are a smoker. With a white keyboard, you see every little fingerprint; every stray ash that might have crossed over on to a key through the air.. This is also a Bluetooth wireless, but its made by a third party (Logitech) that produces some incredible pieces of technology. My mouse if a Logitech MX Air; I can use it as a standard mouse, or just kick back in my chair and use it like a remote. I’m sure it will come in handy one day when I have everything wired to a central entertainment system via this Mac (or another). In a way, this has been a blessing and in fact has kind of been a late birthday gift from the Universe.
So be forewarned, I’m back…and I’ve got a ton of stuff pent up ready to write about. As long as my ash tray, cigarette, and beverage stay FAR on the other side of the desk, that is. On the ‘morrow, Ladies and Gentlemen…
“If you do not the expect the unexpected you will not find it, for it is not to be reached by search or trail.” – Heraclitus